Meghan Markle hijacks Queen’s favorite Christmas tradition for Netflix cash grab in ‘fake’ Montecito rental

The Duchess of Hypocrisy? Meghan Raids the Royal Vault

Meghan Markle has officially declared war on subtlety. The Duchess of Sussex dropped her new Netflix special, With Love, Meghan: Holiday Celebration, on Wednesday, and it is less about holiday cheer and more about a calculated rebranding. Despite fleeing the UK and trashing the Firm for years, Meghan has no problem dipping into the Royal playbook when it suits her aesthetic—and her bank account.

The biggest eyebrow-raiser? Meghan is keeping the British tradition of Christmas Crackers alive in California. Yes, the same novelty paper poppers that were reportedly a personal favorite of the late Queen Elizabeth II.

Sources say the irony is suffocating. Meghan spent years distancing herself from the monarchy, but now that she needs content for her faltering Netflix deal, she is suddenly nostalgic for Sandringham? In the special, she sits down with restaurateur Will Guidara to craft these festive tubes, gushing about how "connected and sweet" the tradition feels.

"She hates the Royals but loves their traditions when the cameras are rolling? Make it make sense. It’s giving identity crisis."

Filming in a 'Fake' House: The Rental Scandal

If the cultural appropriation wasn't enough, let's talk about the setting. You would think the Duchess, who lives in a $14 million Montecito mansion, would film in her own home. Wrong.

Reports confirm that the cozy "craft room" where Meghan is making memories is actually inside a rented property. That’s right—the domestic goddess persona is being staged in a house she doesn't even live in. Industry insiders are whispering that the Sussexes are desperate to curate a "perfect" image that their actual reality can't match, or perhaps they are just terrified of letting the plebs see where they really sleep.

"It feels like a set,"

The 'As Ever' Hustle: It’s Just a Commercial

Let’s be real: this isn't a documentary. It is a QVC pitch with better lighting. The special conveniently dropped at the exact same time as the first holiday collection from her lifestyle brand, As Ever.

Throughout the hour-long episode, the camera lingers lovingly on sparkling wines, hand-poured candles, and artisanal honey—all products Meghan is conveniently selling. She is using Netflix’s platform to hawk fruit spreads. The blatant commercialization of her title has critics in London and Hollywood rolling their eyes.

While she preaches about "finding time to connect," she is really connecting her fans to a checkout page. It is the ultimate influencer move, wrapped in the guise of royal elegance.

Prince Harry's Required PDA Cameo

Of course, no Sussex production is complete without a cameo from Prince Harry to prove that marital bliss is still on the menu. The Duke makes a brief appearance to share a "sweet kiss" with his wife in the kitchen while snacking on treats.

Body language experts are already dissecting the scene. Is it genuine love, or is Harry just another prop in Meghan’s perfectly curated tableau? He pops in, delivers the PDA, and lets Meghan get back to the star of the show: herself.

"Harry looks like a guest in his own life. He just wanders in for a snack and a kiss and then disappears while Meghan runs the empire."

Dropping Details on Archie and Lilibet

Meghan also sprinkled in some rare details about the elusive royal children, Prince Archie and Princess Lilibet. She revealed that Archie, 6, is obsessed with hamburgers and the color red—a distinctly American set of interests for a Prince of the realm.

Meanwhile, Lilibet, 4, is trying to be a "grown-up lady," prompting Meghan to gift her a lavender roller ball in her custom cracker. While fans eat up these crumbs of information, cynics point out that referencing the kids is the easiest way to spike engagement without actually having to show them on camera.

The Verdict: Royal Tradition or Royal Trolling?

By focusing on the Christmas crackers—a tradition explicitly linked to the Royal Family's celebrations at Sandringham—Meghan is walking a fine line. Is she honoring her husband's heritage, or is she trolling the institution she left behind by proving she can do their traditions better, and make money off them?

With guests like Naomi Osaka and Tom Colicchio filling out the roster, the special is a star-studded affair that screams "Hollywood Royalty." But as Meghan pulls the cracker and wears the paper crown, one has to wonder: Is this the new American Dream, or just a really expensive commercial?