THE UNWRITTEN REALITY: A LEGACY OF LIES
It has been nearly years since Lauren Conrad stared blankly into the Los Angeles sunset while Natasha Bedingfield sang about the rain, and let’s be real: the ink on the “unwritten” pages of their lives has dried into a crusty, scandalous mess. When MTV launched The Hills in , they didn’t just create a spinoff of Laguna Beach; they created a monster that would chew up and spit out its young stars, leaving a trail of failed marriages, plastic surgery nightmares, and financial ruin in its wake.
While the revival series The Hills: New Beginnings tried (and failed) to recapture the magic, the real drama has been happening off-screen. We are talking about restraining orders, crystal addictions, fake weddings, and a feud between former besties that is colder than the cryogenic chamber Spencer Pratt probably sleeps in. The cast has splintered into two groups: those who got rich and got out, and those who are still gripping the hem of MTV’s skirt, begging for one more season.
We are peeling back the curtain on the fakery, the finances, and the feuds to reveal where the OGs of Los Angeles drama are today. Spoiler alert: It isn’t all masquerade balls and Les Deux parties anymore.
LAUREN CONRAD: THE BILLIONAIRE BOREDOM
Let’s start with the Queen Bee herself, Lauren Conrad. While her former castmates were busy fighting in dive bars for screen time on the reboot, LC was busy building a beige empire that would make Martha Stewart jealous. The girl who didn’t go to Paris has effectively erased The Hills from her resume, rebranding herself as a Pinterest-perfect lifestyle guru.
Conrad famously refused to join the New Beginnings cast, a move that insiders say was a direct “screw you” to the network that exploited her s. Instead of throwing drinks, she is throwing pottery. Her Kohl’s fashion line and her nonprofit, The Little Market, have reportedly padded her bank account to levels the rest of the cast can only dream of. Sources say LC’s net worth dwarfs everyone else’s combined.
“Lauren really won the game. She got the fame, dumped the toxic friends, married a lawyer, and now she just posts pictures of sourdough bread while everyone else fights for podcast sponsors. Queen behavior.”
But don’t let the soft filters fool you — the ice in her veins is real. To this day, Conrad has allegedly never spoken to Heidi Montag since the infamous “sex tape” rumor that destroyed their friendship in Season . Heidi has tried countless times to extend an olive branch (or a crystal) in the press, but LC remains unbothered and unreachable. She is living in a fortress of neutrality, married to musician-turned-lawyer William Tell, raising two sons, and pretending she never shed a mascara tear over Jason Wahler.
HEIDI AND SPENCER: THE DESPERATION IS REAL
On the complete opposite end of the spectrum, we have Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, collectively known as “Speidi.” If Lauren Conrad is the cautionary tale of how to leave fame gracefully, Speidi is the manual on how to cling to it until your fingernails bleed. The couple, who became the most hated villains in reality TV history, are still together, which is arguably the biggest shock of the century.
However, their road has been bumpy. Spencer famously admitted that they blew through a $ million fortune on crystals, security teams, and apocalyptic prepper gear before the show even ended. Rumors of financial ruin have dogged them for years. They have pivoted to everything from selling hummingbird feeders to launching a podcast just to keep the lights on in the Pratt Daddy crystal palace.
Heidi, who underwent a terrifying plastic surgery procedures in one day back in , has spent the last decade trying to defend her choices and her husband. The couple now has two kids, Gunner and Ryker, and they exploit their family life for TikTok views with a shamelessness that is almost impressive. They are constantly in the press talking trash about LC, proving that even years later, they need her name to make headlines.
AUDRINA PATRIDGE: RESTRAINING ORDERS AND TOXIC EXES
Audrina Patridge was always the “edgy” girl who picked the wrong guys, but her real-life romance turned into a legitimate horror movie. After spending years pining over the combat-boot-wearing Justin Bobby, Audrina married BMX rider Corey Bohan in . It was a disaster from day one.
The divorce was explosive. In , Audrina filed for a restraining order against Bohan, alleging domestic violence and menacing behavior. The court docs were filled with terrifying details of Bohan allegedly shoving her while she held their baby daughter, Kirra. It was a dark turn for the reality star, stripping away the gloss of TV fame to reveal a truly toxic situation.
Since escaping that marriage, Audrina has tried to find love again, but the Justin Bobby curse seems to linger. During the New Beginnings filming, producers tried desperately to force a reunion between the two, but Justin Bobby — true to form — gaslit her into oblivion. Now, Audrina is writing tell-all books claiming Justin Bobby was the “love of her life,” which frankly sounds like a cry for help. She is currently navigating the single mom life in Nashville (and LA), still looking for a guy who will wear a shirt to the beach.
KRISTIN CAVALLARI: THE VILLAIN WON
If Lauren Conrad is the rich aunt, Kristin Cavallari is the hot, chaotic divorcee living her best life. The girl who famously declared “drama” in black chunky heels has arguably had the most successful post-Hills career next to LC. But her personal life? Absolute carnage.
Kristin married NFL quarterback Jay Cutler, and for a while, they were the golden couple of Nashville. They even had their own show, Very Cavallari. But in , the facade cracked. They announced a divorce that got messy fast, with accusations of “inappropriate marital conduct” flying around. Kristin walked away with her jewelry brand, Uncommon James, and a newfound thirst for younger men.
Recently, the -year-old mother of three has been spotted prowling the streets with TikTok stars nearly half her age, including a highly publicized fling with -year-old Mark Estes. Kristin has embraced her “cougar” era with zero shame, proving that she is still the same unapologetic mean girl we fell in love with in . She is rich, she is single, and she is definitely not crying over Stephen Colletti anymore.
BRODY JENNER: THE FAKE WEDDING PRINCE
Brody Jenner was the resident heartthrob of The Hills, but his life has been a bizarre sideshow of the Kardashian circus. The son of Caitlyn Jenner, Brody has spent years trying to distance himself from his famous stepsisters, Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe, while simultaneously dating women who look exactly like them.
His biggest scandal came in when he “married” Kaitlynn Carter in Indonesia. The wedding was a massive storyline, filled with tears because Caitlyn didn’t show up. But when they split a year later, a bombshell dropped: The marriage was never legal. They never filed the paperwork in the US. It was a sham wedding for clout.
Kaitlynn famously went on to have a fling with Miley Cyrus, leaving Brody to pick up the pieces. He has since settled down (somewhat) with pro surfer Tia Blanco, and the two welcomed a baby girl in . Brody is now playing the role of “chill dad DJ,” but insiders whisper that the tension between him and the Kardashian-Jenner clan is still thick enough to cut with a knife.
THE “OTHERS”: REHAB, WELLNESS, AND SECRETS
While the main cast sucks up the oxygen, the supporting players have had their own share of chaos. Jason Wahler, Lauren’s infamous ex who caused her to skip Paris, has battled public demons. His struggle with addiction was documented on Celebrity Rehab, and while he is currently sober and married, his journey has been a harrowing reminder of the dark underbelly of early-s Hollywood excess.
Then there is Stephanie Pratt. Spencer’s sister has burned every bridge in Los Angeles. In a legendary Instagram rant a few years ago, she exposed family secrets, called her sister-in-law Heidi “evil,” and accused her own brother of threatening her. She has since fled to London, presumably to escape the wrath of Speidi.
And we can’t forget Lo Bosworth. The woman who gave us the term “Justin Bobby” has completely scrubbed reality TV from her life. She moved to New York, launched a feminine hygiene company called Love Wellness, and refuses to talk about The Hills in interviews. However, she just made headlines in January for a secret shotgun wedding and a surprise pregnancy, proving that even the most private cast members can’t escape a scandal.
WHITNEY PORT: THE NEUROTIC REWATCHER
Whitney Port, the leggy intern who famously tripped on GMA, has managed to stay relatively scandal-free — until now. She married producer Tim Rosenman, and they have been monetizing their nostalgia by rewatching old episodes of The Hills on YouTube. However, fans have grown concerned recently over Whitney’s appearance and frantic energy, sparking rumors about her health.
She has admitted to marriage struggles and fertility issues, documenting multiple miscarriages for her audience. It is a raw, heartbreaking pivot from her fashion designer persona. Whitney is arguably the most relatable of the bunch, but she is also trapped in the nostalgia loop, forced to relive her s for clicks.
JUSTIN BOBBY: STILL A GHOST
Finally, we have Justin Bobby Brescia. The man, the myth, the legend who burps and leaves. Where is he? Nobody really knows. He pops up occasionally to play a guitar, mumble something incoherent about “truth and vibes,” and then vanishes into the desert. He remains the only cast member who seems genuinely allergic to a -to- job.
Insiders say he is still living the “homeboy wore combat boots to the beach” lifestyle, refusing to conform to society’s standards of hygiene or employment. He is the cockroach of The Hills: unkillable, unchangeable, and always lingering in the background.
CLIFFHANGER: THE NEXT GENERATION?
With most of the cast now raising children of their own, the terrifying reality sets in: The Hills: Next Gen is inevitable. Speidi is already training their kids for the spotlight. Kristin’s kids are athletes. Lauren’s kids are probably already investing in real estate.
Will history repeat itself? Will we see Gunner Pratt feuding with a Cavallari offspring in ? The cycle of toxicity seems destined to continue. The Hills are alive with the sound of drama, and as long as there is a check to be cashed, these people will find a way to be in front of a camera.
